HOMESCHOOLING PARENTS NEED TIME OUT TOO.

My beautiful and wise daughter-in-law on her wedding day to our son.

When I told my daughter-in-law Amy that I was "benched; feeling so tired and stressed all of the time," she took my hands in hers and looked me in the eye and said, "Linda, when was the last time you did something for yourself." I have to admit my hackles went up a little; I don't like being told what to do and I made all kinds of excuses eg: I'm just too busy to take time for myself, the kids need me, there's no-one else I can rely on, I wouldn't know what to do with myself if I had time alone etc. She stood there and looked at me and I could see what she was thinking - it was written on her face - "she's a tough nut and it's up to me to crack her." Poor thing! Then we all sat down for our family dinner but she kept looking at me during the meal and pointing her fork and me and saying, "I'm not done with you yet, I'm not giving up," and I would laugh and try to change the subject and that's when it dawned on me .  .  . being so stubborn was doing my head in, literally and right there I asked myself why I was doing that. Maybe deep down I like feeling like a martyr, I don't know, I'm too close to me to know but I could see that she was right - she really got through to me. 

The truth was that I couldn't remember the last time I had time to myself (and if my naturopath is reading this he's probably cringing because he's the one that helped me recover from adrenal fatigue a few years ago). Someone that I loved deeply died back in April this year and since then I have been floundering in my private life. I didn't know what was wrong with me but Amy sure did.

Last week I went to have a massage at a day spa and came out feeling like a brand new me. I came home and told my husband that he is going next weekend, as a father's day treat - he needs this too I realised. And I spent that time there doing other things and catching up on writing my journal and when we got home the kids had cleaned up the house and done most of the gardening - further proof that Amy is right, the world will keep spinning if I take myself off regularly and "do my own thing."

Another thing that we do, although not often enough, is we go to a nice hotel room and lock ourselves inside for an entire 20 hours. We have a bath, order food to the room and watch in-house movies and we sleep. Having time out is an essential for home schooling and having a network of people to remind you, in case you forget, is also essential.

At the tender age of 19 Amy has qualified as a hairdresser, they have bought their first house and they are both fabulous parents (very enthusiastic and energetic owing to their young ages) but most importantly of all she is deeply intelligent and caring and everyone who meets her has no choice but to take her into their hearts, such is her compassion and beautiful nature. Here's some of Amy's quotes that she lives by and puts into our cards at birthday time;

     "The more you lose yourself in something bigger than yourself the more energy you have."

     "As long as you're going to be thinking anyway, think big."

     "Some people dream of great accomplishments while others stay awake and do them."

     "Logic will get you from a) to b) while imagination will take you everywhere."

     "DREAM BIG!!"

     "Formal education will make you a living, self-education will make you a fortune."